Day 29: Suicidal

Pamela Bane stares into the abyss.

Tonight I stood on the ledge of darkstone castle and stared down into the abyss for a long time. My friend Hawk was trying to talk me down. He even tried to get up on the ledge to pull me off but he tumbled off himself. Fortunately he was wearing his brown soft-soled shoes (totally mismatched with his otherwise handsome black tuxedo - but the brown shoes probably saved his life.)

Hawk pleading with me not to jump.

When he came back upstairs I felt guilty, so I came down off the ledge. I also agreed to let Hawk keep me safe in a cage for the night, provided that I could squeeze my bed inside, which I barely managed to do. So I am writing this blog in my bed, inside a locked glass cage at Darkstone.

Pamela Bane as she writes her sad blog entry tonight.

Earlier today, my custodian cruelly informed me that if I ever demanded to be unbaned she would turn me into a permanent inflatable sex doll. She showed me a picture of one of her pets who she just turned into a sex doll.

I feel ugly, and unloved. I'm still waiting for my figure to improve from the so-called Bane diet. I hope this depression is just a temporary phase. I don't know if I can survive like this much longer.

Black Orchids - HELP!!!

Day 26: Depressed

Today my custodian allowed me access to my inventory. She said I had earned it by "being good". I took advantage right away and rezzed my bed in Darkstone Castle, so I could sleep in a warm safe place for the first time in almost a month.

Before I could get to sleep another girl who I didn't know came up the stairs and into the room where I was trying to sleep. She saw that I was a Bane and turned to walk away. I tried to engage her in emote chat, and what she said made me feel very depressed. Here is the transcript:

[14:50] Pamela Munro tries to wave hi
[14:51] Aimee Riptide: ...
[14:51] Pamela Munro cant hear chat
[14:51] Pamela Munro can hear short emotes
[14:51] Aimee Riptide waves her hands
[14:51] Aimee Riptide gestures sorry
[14:51] Pamela Munro says no problem
[14:51] Aimee Riptide points at exit
[14:51] Aimee Riptide turns to go
[14:52] Pamela Munro is dissapointed
[14:52] Pamela Munro likes to talk
[14:52] Pamela Munro even though its hard
[14:52] Pamela Munro do you know Giri?
[14:52] Aimee Riptide turns hands upwards
[14:53] Aimee Riptide shakes head
[14:53] Pamela Munro you are welcome to stay
[14:53] Aimee Riptide thinks using emotes
[14:53] Aimee Riptide to chat
[14:53] Aimee Riptide defeats the point
[14:54] Pamela Munro slumps in despair
[14:54] Aimee Riptide shakes her head
[14:55] Pamela Munro knows Aimee is right
[14:55] Aimee Riptide sighs

I realize now that I have been cheating regularly by using emotes as a substitute for chat. I feel like I have failed as a Bane. I wonder if it is possible for my Custodian to disable emotes? I'm afraid that is probably what needs to happen if I am to experience the true pain and suffering of Banishment.

Day 22: Lonely

It has been many days since my last post. I have been alone most of the time, in Darkstone Castle, unable to teleport.

I am now in my fourth week of Banishment. I think I'm doing okay. I have some difficulty imagining life in SL as an un-bane now. Being Bane forces you to adapt. It is getting lonely for me. My friend June is now bound and gagged herself, so its even harder to get together with her. I did score by making contact with my old pal Jill, from the Black Orchids. I have missed her these past 2 months.

I have started reading the story Eudeamon, finally. It is soooooo erotic... Being a Bane myself I really feel as if I am the main character. Does anyone know who wrote Eudeamon? Really nice writing. When I am done reading the story, and done reading it for the 2nd and 3rd time, I will post a book review here.

Bye for now.

Day 17: Officially an Introvert

Hi all,

I have been keeping a low profile lately and it seems to be working. I have not been perm-a-bonded (yet). My former custodian told me that all of her pets have been perm-a-bonded in the past few days. She said some of them hate their new colors (yellow, etc...).

I saw my former custodian today and I'm starting to think I now have 2 custodians, because they both seem to have the same control over me. She told me she has learned that I am an introvert because I am doing so well and thriving as a BANE. I told her it's true; I am an introvert. But I'm also about 25% extrovert. Anyway she put me in a hanging cage for a little while and then transferred me to an isolation capsule and left.

Me in the hanging cage today. I like this cage. It's kind of sexy.

My view as Custodian thoughtfully builds a ramp at the door of my isolation cell.

I was preparing for a lonely day when I heard my friend June outside the isolation capsule. She just wanted to say hello, so she found me on the map. June is a pretty smart cookie. Within a couple of minutes she had somehow unlocked the capsule and I was free!

June figured out how to open the locked isolation capsule.

Unfortunately we didn't have much time to celebrate because June's pony Henry got himself trapped in a cage downstairs. June found him before I did. By the time I found them they were both trapped in cages. (Castle Darkstone is a place to avoid.) Here is a picture of the three of us after their cage timers ran out.

June, Henry and I somewhere in the lower levels of Darkstone.

Once again we had little time to celebrate because Custodian came back. June was smart and TPed out just before Custodian arrived. But poor Henry didn't. I told him to run several times but he lingered around for a few too many seconds. Custodian did something to him in those few seconds; now she has some invisible magnet inside Henry.

Well Custodian decided that I should be punished for June and Henry's behavior. So she put me another isolation cell with a green bubble shower.

Me being punished for June and Henry's misdeeds.

Day 13: Where is the SLBI?

Today was another bad day for the good citizens of SL. I was TPed to a secret location and met Royal for the first time. Unfortunately she had just been semi-perma-bonded by my former custodian, and so naturally Royal was a little upset. At least her face was spared the permabond latex covering, and I was told that the semi-perma-bond sentence would last from 90 - 180 days.

My Custodian tormenting Giri & Associates' latest victim. This poor girl was semi-permabonded today (covered in an inescapable layer of thick black latex) for 90 - 180 days.

I have a question: WHERE THE **** IS THE SLBI???

We have mad Custodians running around SL turning innocent people into permanent Banes, and now their latest hobby is turning innocent people into perma-bonded, latex-covered, helpless bound victims.

I know, I know,...you SLBI people are too busy arresting jaywalkers and shaking down local merchants for "protection" money... I personally think the SLBI is either controlled by Giri & Associates, or else they are just plain afraid of her.

And where are all the other self-styled law enforcement agencies in SL? Come on people, time to put down the box of donuts and start doing something to try to stem this serious crime wave. Its looking more and more like anarchy around here.

Day 12: back to normal BANE

After hiding all weekend (and figuring out how to use the new RL viewer) my custodian offered me a TP. I accepted the TP and landed right in a cage, of course. I was tired of running. I figure whatever is going to happen may as well happen sooner rather than later.

Well there was no talk of Perm-a-bonding me tonight, and I still have my own skin. Perhaps they were just trying to scare me, and they did that. I took a nice profile photo of Custodian before logging out for the night.


I guess I'm doing pretty well as a BANE overall.

Day 11: Running for my life

Today, before logging in, I read the comment by my former Custodian, posted under Thursday's Blog (Day 9). It made my heart sink.

It appears that my days as Pamela Munro will end soon. They are going to throw me into the Perm-a-Bond machine, and I will be permanently and inescapably covered from head to toe in thick latex, just like my custodian. I will never be able to see my own face or body again. My friends will also never see "me" again. I am heartbroken.

I am not going to let them turn me into a permabond BANE without a fight. I have been running and hiding from my custodian and her friends all day. I tried to commit myself to the Paine Asylum - where at least I would be in a secure guarded facility - but I was turned away. I guess they thought I was more of a medical freak than a psychiatric case.

I cried for help on an open IM channel, hoping someone from the Bane Liberation Army would hear my desperate plea for help. Someone did hear me! then she just giggled. (Sob)

Finally my dear friend Yrsa from the Black Orchids found me, and asked if I needed help. I sobbed in despair. She brought me to a hiding place, where I intend to spend the weekend, keeping out of sight and trying to figure out some way to avoid being permabonded.

Yrsa found me in desperate straights today, and whisked me off to a temporary hiding place.

Thank you so much Yrsa. What you did for me today was very brave. Please watch out for yourself.

Me resting in my hiding place, just before I drifted off to sleep, and into permabond nightmares.